Friday, April 20, 2001
James a day later

Yesterday was another example of how unpredictable life with cancer can be. Following a late afternoon telephone consultation with oncology, where we discussed the fact that the pain was now only in the leg, we decided on a different approach, so instead if checking in for the ICE chemo, we made our way to Princess Margaret Hospital for 9am this morning. At simulator B James lay very still while his sore right leg was scanned and marked up with green marker pens, and then a short while later James cheerfully received 800 rads to the right femur. The radiation room is heavily shielded, and only the patient stays inside for the radiation treatment. This is fine with James who enjoys these tecnological adventures, but I had a tearful moment waiting outside. The 12 inch thick door slid closed and the green light reading "Please enter" changed to a red light "Do not enter - room in use". My difficulty lay in accepting that this was palliative treatment and that over the next 60 seconds permanent damage would be done to his right leg, stunting long term growth and who knows what else. I knew the decision to irradiate was a good one and would control the pain quickly, but it was another step along a road none of us wish to take. Quality of life today got a big boost, while the hope of a cure felt even more distant.

So here we are, having just returned to Peterborough to a lovely spring day. Although the prediction was James might need a couple of days post radiation before walking, I am pleased to say that he is out in the flower garden, already walking with the help of a cane, no wheelchair, having a great day. One day at a time.

Syd

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